30 September 2006

Birthdays Run Amuck

This weekend, I'm helping multiple friends celebrate birthdays.

Which of course, makes one reflect on the age of oneself and all that one has accomplished, or not.

Do you ever have to consciously remind yourself not to compare yourself with those around you? Surely I am not the only one? I don't think of myself as particularly competitive or anything, but I am definitely very self-reflective.  When I see someone else smoking it reminds me why I don't smoke.  I've never smoked, never will.  When I see someone thinking about their career choices, it reminds me to review my own.

The thing about it is that I sometimes I find myself thinking, what would I do in that situation?  How would I react if I were them?  Why are they making those choices, and if faced with their predicament for better or worse, what woe would I release?

I guess it isn't a comparison per se, more of a twisted empathy and vapid self-loathing.  Then I reaize that I am not in that situation and my choices of yesterday would not lead me to that situation and therefore my reactions in that situation are more or less irrelevant and I should be supportive and encouraging and less self-critical and perhaps just have a drink and relax.

All that from a birthday bash, hmm?

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