Most people would probably agree that I am very much a Man. I'm a big guy, I'm analytical and a problem-solver, I talk fast and when I'm not paying attention can tend to behave much like a bull in a china shop. I can be insensitive, unempathetic, and often just down-right stupid. Then again, I am a man. Bumbling around is expected to be pretty much the par for the course.
Growing up I had broken lips, pissed blood, and got thrown through my share of closet-doors, just the same as any kid growing up in an abusive household. I know a little about cruelty and have first-hand experience on the business end of just nasty and evil people can be. I say all that to frame my the next sentence...women can really be cruel.
We all know the old adage about sticks and stones, and we all generally accept that it is the reverse which is really true. I definitely bear witness that the worst wounds are always on the inside.
Being somewhat versed in the power of psychology, it is my general opinion that women, being on-the-whole, more in touch with the verbal and intimate are therefore more capable of creating deep and lasting hurt than some moronic man flailing around like an imbecile. This in no way should be taken as a light view of the utter contempt and loathing I bear for those who inflict physical pain on others. I've been there, and this is my opinion. The scars that cripple me today can't be seen on the surface any more (unless you happen to rub the bump on the back of my head, hehe).
From that viewpoint, I have found that women, being generally more in touch with the tune of emotion, wield words with the precision of a surgeons scapel incising your insides to an excruciating effect. Their ability to destroy a life is matched only by their ability to create one.
Okay, so maybe I'm a little bitter from having been taken advantage of yet again. And quite thoroughly divested of all dignity this time as well. It is only Faith that keeps me upright. In the face of a selfish, petty, and vindictive assault I can only retreat inside my Faith. You never quite realize how big your Faith can be, how infinite your Salvation is, until you feel how far from God this world has fallen.
The challenge now is not just to survive, but to thrive. Surely I can find a way to not let my sweeping generalities about the feminine capability for cruelty color my day to day worldview.
If you've had enough of all your tryin'
Just give up the state of mind you're in…
- Change Your Mind, Sister Hazel